I recently deleted my Facebook and Instagram accounts, my reasons were many but when I did, I signed off with the statement that I am going wandering. Wandering is where I have found joy, and hope, always hope. You see when I wander, I am giving life a chance to find me. I learned that when I am chasing life, I miss too much. Today as I was having my morning coffee, Bronze Radio Return stopped me cold and its been on repeat ever since.
Have you been lost today? Did it surprise you? What did you find?
Let’s talk about wandering, from birth I had the structures of religion bound into my thoughts and actions. It taught me that I would only find joy after death, it taught me the sheer terror of wandering into sin. I have spent the last twenty years tearing myself free from those strictures. I am now at a place of believing that there can be joy today, and wandering is part of that joy. As I let myself wander this life, breathing in all that is around me, I am able to experience hope and friendship that I would have missed before, because I was wearing the blinders of attempting to break the yoke that religion had on me.
This wandering has taken me to places that renew my hope, just the other day I got to sit down and have lunch with a new friend, I would have missed him if I were not wandering. We found a common joy in music and being a source of hope for one another. This friendship has the potential of being a very deep lifelong bond and I am richer for it. While we are surrounded by fear and the unknown of what is 2020, we are all wandering, we are all lost. There is no normal or certainty about anything in a way that no one living today has ever experienced. Embrace this journey, grab all the hope and joy you can find and embrace the wandering, you may find it will free you.
The timing of hearing this song along with that lunch conversation are no coincidence. It is not chance that I work at the neighborhood grocery store and have found a way to give what hope I can to those I work with and those that come through for their groceries. This is where my wandering has taken me, and it was a deliberate choice to abandon the predictable path that I was on and follow my own road. I have no idea where this will take me, I just know that I have found hope and I will continue to listen for the magic in music and sharing what feeds my soul.
Bronze Radio Return is a band that has crossed my aural path several times, but I am not intimately familiar with their catalog of music. There is no doubt that they have touched magic and sent it out for us to enjoy. Still Wandering is a simple song and that is where its magic is rooted. It does not try to enthrall us with complicated rhythms or rhyme’s, it just speaks to our souls. This song is a gift of incredible value to me. It is giving me another day of hope and an opportunity to see that my path is true. I will continue chasing death as hard as I can, pushing at that veil so it fears me and not the other way around. Still Wandering is about winning life, not just living it.
Each day we have choices, some are small and have almost no consequences. Others may seem small but can carry massive consequences. If you are open to seeing the universe around you and if you are willing to gather the story of those around you, then you can succeed and wander. From my side of the grocery store I see you struggling just to breathe. Sometimes you are open to a smile or a word of encouragement but sometimes you are just sad. Don’t hide from the wonder of the journey. I see your pain, you matter to me, put some headphones on and put this song on repeat. Let it feed your soul… the magic is real. I want you to see the new normal with me, I want you to wander and discover this beautiful joy I have found… it’s your story, it’s yours to wander.
Listening, learning, and growing…